Change that Lasts

ECS believes that with the right support, anyone can overcome the scars of life and find peace to achieve things previously thought impossible. The ECS counsellor focuses on “What happened to you” rather than “What’s wrong with you”, and is passionate about working to alleviate your emotional pain and suffering, helping you to find healing and freedom.

“We cannot heal what we cannot feel. Without acknowledging our core feelings, we lose our sense of self" Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw

Emotions aren't moral, rather a ‘window’ to our inner experiences. It is not uncommon to experience more than one of the emotional experiences described below simultaneously.

Anger

In our modern society, anger can often be seen as a moral failing or hazard. We feel angry when our boundaries or basic needs are being violated. It is how we express our anger that we should be cautious about. Sometimes we unconsciously repress our anger to keep ourselves or others safe. Working through your anger in a safe relationship with your trusted counsellor can be cleansing, empowering and life-giving!

LonEliness

We're more 'connected' than ever before and yet studies consistently tell us that loneliness is on the rise. Connectedness is vital to human survival, yet feelings of loneliness are often stigmatised. We feel lonely when we are disconnected with our loved ones, our communities, our family and friends, and ourselves. A sensitive counsellor will meet your need for connection without creating dependency, while guiding you in reconnecting the disconnected relationships, making new connections, or connecting with yourself at a deep level.

Depression

The Black Dog, depression is a pain felt by many and without appropriate support can have dire consequences. However it is also a condition that time and again people have overcome with support and care. Feelings of depression can be the natural response to what has happened to you. A helpful counsellor will work with you to find out the root causes of your depression at your pace, and build your inner coping capacity so you no longer feel depleted. See blog on Emptiness, Despair, and Helplessness.

Anxiety

The most common of reported ailments. Anxiety can be rooted in many sources and as such can be worked through using many methods. Appropriate guidance in therapy equips you with strategies in overcoming this issue effectively, so you feel empowered and in control of your daily life. See blog on Anxiety

Ambivalence

Experiencing the polarity of emotions is a very common human experience yet it is almost incomprehensible in our culture. The Tao of Fully Feeling by Pete Walker

We feel ambivalent when we experience contradictory feelings simultaneously. For example, “I don’t know if I love you or hate you”; “If I want to stay or if I want to go”; “I want to be vulnerable with you but I don’t know if I can trust you”, etc. We feel confused and unsettled maybe because we see our emotional experience as unacceptable. An emotionally-informed counsellor is able to assist you to gain clarity, and process what you are currently experiencing, so you are able to understand and be informed by your inner experiences.

Stress

How often have you had this quick conversation:

"How are you?"

"Busy"

Stress is like pushing a boulder up a hill, there's only so long we can strive before it rolls back over us and it's in our best interests to figure out sustainable ways to deal with stress before that happens. Counselling can help you deal with current stress while also figuring out how to sustainably manage your stress going forwards.

Spirituality - identity | purpose | destiny

The topic of spirituality is not limited to sets of different religious beliefs and practices. Seeking deeper meaning and pursuing life questions such as Identity, Purpose, and Destiny are essential aspects of the human experience. An ethical counsellor provides appropriate mirroring and helpful guidance so you feel validated, free and safe to explore this topic effectively in a way that meets your personal values. See blog on Our sense of self and internalised oppression.

Sexuality

The topic of sexuality can be very confusing and difficult to bring up due to the stigma and shame that can be attached. A self-aware and personally secure counsellor provides a safe therapeutic space for you, where this topic can be openly discussed, processed and integrated without judgement and shame put on you. See blog on Pondering on our understanding of sex.

HURT | PSYCHOLOGICAL injuries

It is common knowledge that human beings are social and relational beings. Yet experiences of hurt and pain from relationships are not uncommon. Psychological injuries can happen from bullying, betrayal or abuse from many contexts such as school, work, friendship circles, church, or even romantic and family relationships. A counsellor who has had first-hand experience of the recovery journey can provide deep understanding of your hurt and suffering. Recovery can be achieved in the mental, emotional and somatic layers guided at your pace with safety and sensitivity. See blog on Physical pain and Emotional pain.

sorrow | grief

Grieving empties out old hurt so that there is room in the heart to wish and want and dream again.

The Tao of Fully Feeling by Pete Walker

Society can feel like it constantly demands us to put on a “happy face”. Even our well intention loved ones can be unsure at times in how to help us through our sorrow and loss. A qualified counsellor guides you effectively in processing the sorrow and grief in your life, so it will no longer debilitate or overwhelm you.

trauma | trauma recovery

Trauma is not the thing that happened, but the effect left within us by our experiences.

Trauma recovery work is about taking care of your present while processing your past.

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van der Kolk

A trauma-informed counsellor understands the immense importance of establishing safety in the counselling space, and is able to assist you to tolerate the overwhelming trauma sensations, emotions and reactions so that you are not constantly being hijacked by them.

complex trauma | emotional flashback

The role of traumatized childhoods in most adult psychological disorders is enormous.

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker

It is crucial that your counsellor is clinically trained in complex trauma and understands and is able to help you to recognise/manage the painful emotional flashbacks that you might be experiencing.

See blog on: Complex Trauma and Emotional Flashback

Psychological pain | guilt | Shame

To walk through it or to walk around it…

When we learn to experience our feelings directly, we eventually discover that surrendering to them is by far the most efficient - and, in the long run, least painful - way of responding to them. The Tao of Fully Feeling by Pete Walker